Boulder is now saying “Mama.” Of course, he calls most everyone Mama at this point, but he gives it a special emphasis (read: unbelievably high volume) when he’s directing his “Mama” at me.
It’s fun and so exciting to watch him grow, developing a little more each day, mimicking words and sounds. However, I’m realizing that now I have THREE little people who can call my name — all at once. Cacophony is the only word to describe it. Just when I thought the volume level couldn’t get any higher… 
Sometimes I just have to stop and laugh at the chaos that is our home. And honestly, at other times, the thought crosses my mind that I’m crazy. Why on earth would I do this to myself? Three and a half kiddos in five years? In this lifestyle that I’ve chosen, ME time is almost nonexistent.
And, I’m just a few weeks into my second trimester with this fourth pregnancy…and the aches and pains have already begun. Restless legs are making it difficult to fall asleep. Using anything other than perfect posture results in back spasms. Chasing the kiddos around leaves me breathless. Maybe I really am crazy.
But then I walk past the stack of books on the end table, and the title “Don’t Waste Your Life” jumps out at me. (If you’ve read Piper’s book, you know that an easy, self-focused, safe life isn’t what he condones.)
Or our breakfast-time Proverb of the day happens to be chapter 31:
She looks well to the ways of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.
Her children rise up and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her. (v 27-28)
Or I read a blog post by Sally Clarkson, a source of inspiration for so many mothers, who is now grieving the end of a phase of life as her youngest child is preparing to leave the nest.
Or my youngest unexpectedly crawls up into my lap for a snuggle. Or I find my two oldest holding hands as they walk around the yard searching for grasshoppers.
I’m not crazy. I’m blessed.
-Abby
Good, GOOD stuff.
Love it
A little crazy…after all you went camping with a one year old while pregnant.
A friend and I have been having a conversation along the same lines…we are both doing a curriculum based on the Little House Series. We are enjoying reading the books again as adults – seeing life from Ma’s point of view instead of Laura’s…it is causing us to have some serious conversations about priorities, life choices, and what we view as ‘hard’. (or in your case view as ‘crazy’). Interesting stuff…thanks for sharing your thoughts (and the updates on your TODDLER!)
Yeah, it’s true, I probably am a little crazy sometimes.
That’s so interesting how Little House has affected your perspective on life. Makes me want to read the series again…they were my favorite as a kid!
Well, welcome to the crazy “4 under 5″ club!!
One thing I realized while struggling with some of the same “I love my children but they are driving me insane!” issues is that the word “blessing” doesn’t necessarily include the word “easy.” I think our modern church has this mistaken idea that if God gives us a blessing, it’s going to be in a way that makes our lives easier or makes us feel good about it, but that’s just not true. Sometimes blessings are both good AND hard! Being blessed with lots of money also comes with a big responsibility to use it wisely – being blessed with lots of children even more so! I’ll be praying that you can make it through this pregnancy as easily as possible and still be able to look after your older ones. I know its hard!
Exactly, Katya! The best blessings are often the hardest, but they’re the best because they bring us back to dependence on God rather than self-sufficiency. Having a houseful of energetic little ones has shown me my need for the Lord more than anything else I’ve experienced!
A blessed young woman, indeed you are!
Love the picture!
Oh, Abby, well said! Thank you! Thanks for letting Him speak through you here today!
I linked to this from my post today.